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Saturday, July 28, 2007
GRRRRR
gimme a little time; i need to think straight.
or rather, HOW i should start this little view of mine. *takes a deep breath* alright. i have to say this. because this is really getting on my nerves. i mean, usually u dun see IVYTAN get soooo tensed up and easily irritated, 'cept maybe for this past month. i mean, even my TE-BU realised it, and i have STONY asking me "vvytann, why are you so emo nowadays? if anything? i can 'KAO DAO' you. i am dam good at 'KAI DAO'-ing people can.." gosh. i can just stone halfway during a game, or talk to someone then stop focusing halfway, or i can do my work earnestly then suddenly the mood's gone. i dunno wats hapening to me. i mean, i must HAVE already offended a lot of people in class liao. not tat i care anyways. but still, a word of apology to anyone out there. but of course, tat excludes the jersey issue. seriously, i dunno wats wrong with you people, or maybe the problem is with me. OH, and THANKS MAN. for all these: (*the word YOU here i use doesnt mean anyone SPECIFICALLY, it could be a THEY, a WE, a whatever. i tink if YOU r reading this, u oughtta know) 1) crediting us for being the INITIATORS for the idea for a class jersey. i cant remember or why YOU said tat, probably because i wore his jersey to a project, and u start asking me questions and asked if we would like a class jersey or something like tat, cause if we did, you guys must be informed fast, so it would be done soon. if i din remeber wrongly, it was a meeting in the june holidays. and now, WE get all the credit for initiating the god-dammed idea. THANKS AR. [[whoa. i cant even think of how this whole thing started, but now in this fit of anger, i remembered. not bad..]] 2) EXPRESSING your emotions DRAMATICALLY in front of the class, making it seem as if WE were the blasted kids who go around ruining your day. aww jeez, i am sooo 'sorry' if this line punched you in the face. too bad; i have no talent for trying to hide things and feelings. except for some personal ones, maybe. anyways. please dun get the idea tat just becuase u did tat, we will be so apologetic. NO. IN ANY CASE, WE AINT, and i must say, we were ANYTHING but sorry. to be specific, i tink the whole lot of us there were kinda...DISGUSTED. yeah. tats the word. then some GOODWILLED people came along and told us to..you know, compromise. and they say some things like OH NO, we r NOT blaming you. just tat they said u guys initiated the idea, and now you guys say u dun wanna buy liao, its like wasting their efforts. THANKS. I JUST LOVE these accusations. COME ON. MAKE MORE OF IT. 3) MAKING us SO DA-PAI. ok. those are the three main things tat led to other, more minor things. let me start. FIRST. oh wait. take out ur chips and drinks, knives and daggers; this is gonna be long and offensive. FIRST. fancy u making up the fact that we initiated the idea. THANKS. A LOT. i mean it, like oh, i dun wan GOOD credit; i simply LOOOVE the fact tat you had to make it as if we came up with the idea, and then we backed out after so long. HELLO. GET A LIFE. just because we said we dun wanna buy, doesnt mean the WHOLE idea has to back out correct? i mean majority of the class still wants the CLASS jersey. CORRECT? just the few of u without tat jersey doesnt mean WE ARE NOT UNITED. and oh, for crying out loud. we can just stop pretending we are a united class, i can tell you, cause we are NOT. if you didnt realise this, WAKE UP NOW. other than events, we are TOTALLY seperated into different groups. as mr yeo calls it, our class has a Clique Problem. its not tat big an issue; everyclass has it i mean, i mean, who is soooo corny to actually stick to 40 other students in the class and be soooo close to everyone of them? i tink not. MOSTLY, anyways. and 9 outta 10 of those [[i doubt the total no can even reach 10]] are PRETENDING. and i HATE pretending. stop it yeh? i believe life will be so much easier. i mean, how can u be united when someone just keeps talking bad about another in the class and brainwashing them to hate that person like brainless morons? and worse, YOU pretend to care about every single soul in the class...gosh. so yeh. main point is, 404 is not TAT united as it seems, but i dun think its too late yet to change the fact. cause i MUST SAY. the class video is reeeeeeallly FUN. anyways. sidetracked too much. now, where was i...oh. initiating the idea. anyways. yien was telling me, Even if it was you whu initiated the idea, who would have known it would be so big an issue? seriously, think about it. writing the number 44, or some F1 or M1 or some bloody toilet labels tat will make us look like walking toilet cubicles on the back of our jerseys just cause some people dun like register numbers, ok, tats not too bad; its a democratic world. but still. these ideas, and i must say, even my own idea, to seperate reg no of guys and gals was pretty bad off, in the sense tat u people wanted to appear as a class. ok. fine. i'll try to pretend to careif u guys r all reeeally so devoted into putting it tat way; UNITY. ugh. seriously. no, dun go all swearing bout me now, i only feel this way cause...nehmind. i shant bother to elab. i guess its a personal thing. anyways, a jersey. should be as simple as it seems correct? go by default? standard? we dun have to come up with all these farny stuff just to, you know, show something we r not. end of point one. SECOND. i tink the reason u leaked like a tap and bawled like the whole world upset u is because u put in A LOR OF EFFORT into making the class jersey, voting and stuff, and at the end of the day, when the three of us went up to ask if u have placed the order cause we werent so sure we wanted to buy those jerseys, u just feel so UNJUST. yeh. i know tat kinda feeling. anger, watever. anyways. you didnt have to make it seem as if we did u wrong, you know. at this rate, you can go take part in the star idol search, but overexaggeration...i dun tink works for them either. anyways. we only went around to say the jerseys not ordered yet. and u jumped to conclusions and thought we were asking everyone whu didnt like the jersey to cancel order. we almost got to tat point, of course; the idea was DELICIOUS. anyways. u think ppl so ungrateful de mehs? cancel jiu cancel. u aint dirt man, though if u continue to be like tat, u may just turn into a heap. so we pretty much respect u guys looking at the effort u put in. and u didnt have to act fierce and scold us, cause we aint wimpy little crybabies, and we dun bawl over little things like tat unless we r really really upset. and oh, dun think just cause u cried, we'd let you. no, tats not the point. i m sure u dun think tat way; i am halluncinating. but if u do, GOD. i really pity u. THIRD. when you stopped in your tracks and turned back when going to PE to ask us if we were really gonna not buy the jersey, the whole gang up front turned and looked at the three of us with tat expession i really din know how to put into words..u make us feel so unnecesarily BIG. jeez. HELLO. we aint no despo A.A wimps living on the rare and apparently, crucial, essential, ATTENTION. tat, we can live without, thank you very much. hence, i din really feel very thankful tat u had to put us in such a position. god. and u think u r almighty. OH. b4 i forget, even if we did initiate the idea, if both of us didnt remember wrongly, so wat if we did initiate the idea but we refuse to buy cause of the ugly base colour? har? i mean. its not wrong wat. is there a rule saying we must buy wat we suggest? shtoopid ar? come on luhs! i mean, suggest le, majority of class still wan wat. a few back out also nehmind one right. like walau. need to cry til like wat mehs. anyways. i dun really care anymore. my group of frenz, my family. aiyah. this past month i dam qing xu hua. keep bahaving weirdly. DAM EMO. and i know i have REALLY offended loads of ppl. but i dun really care. im CRAZY now. i cant control my emotions much anymore. and i cant concentrate. and i feel funny. FUNNY. i dun care wat u say. i admit im kinda selfish. im kinda weird at times, especially now. my mariah said i always quite good de, suddenly outta the blue come emo-ing. and i still dunno why. haha. i dun care anyways. and oh. hey reader, i know u r there. and if u survived to see this due to my LOONG LOOOONG post, well. gratz. and im here to tell u, u make me as sick as i make u. and i DO wanna PUKE when i see how u contradicturself and make it as if u r the worst thing on earth, maybe u r, maybe u r not. but now i cant think clearly, and please, next time, when u wanna accuse someone after kistening to some lame shit gossip, have some initiative to go find out the other half of the story. it will stun u sometimes, like how this did, LOSER. *pukes and gags* whatever happenes anyways, i dun give a dam anymore. and oh. HAHA i cant believe i am anticipating togetting my own class jersey on monday. gosh. i shock myself at times like this. i mean, IRONIC isnt it? haha. i cant believe this, but its like..wanting to see something u r forced to pay for but u dun really like. MEMORABLE. now tat i raked up everyting i felt moody about, i tink i should be able to feel some peace. god. and let me just forget this matter, its kinda annoying. i mean, this dispute should be forgotten by now; now i've put it down. i dunno bout u though. but my thoughts of u will nv change from now. maybe urs of me wun either, but u dun see me giving a frigging dam, HYPOCRITE. i dun wanna turn into another you. i shall just say this out loud, and not hide it and gossip behind ppl's back. cause now, everyone knows how i feel. maybe u should try to understand too, and maybe i will too. not til u do first, though. nite, LOSER. |
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